member of the human race

my mother is one of those drivers who is extremely confident with her driving but only if she knows where she is going.

on the other hand if she does not know her route then all hell will break loose, her confidence gets thrown out the window, and even if she kinda knows the route she will still get panicky and will hold onto the steering wheel as though she is hanging of a cliff and if she loosens her hold then she will fall :0).

lets just say that she has no trust in me what so ever :(

why?

well a couple of times i would be directing her, then i would find my self lost, but no way am i going to tell her that, so i would pretend that i know where i am going completely directing her to the end of the world and back until either i or she recognises a street or building.

she cottoned on to this and from then on does not trust me with directions as she feels that i have no awareness of direction, ooooooooh the hurt and the pain.

the other day i wanted to go to the Lowrey which is shopping complex in salford queys, my mum refuses to drive there as she does not know the route so usually my dad will drop us of and pick us up when where done, on this occasion my dad was busy, so i said to my mum:

me: mama shir rayik kanee jibitlik ill directions word for word (mum what would you say if i brought you the directions word for word?)

mama: min wayn 7atjeebee? (from where are you going to bring it?)

me: theres this website AA.com and they have a route planner, you type in the postcode of the where your journey is starting from and then you type in the post code of where it ends, it then prints of a step by step guide of how to get there.

mama: bahee shin dhaminee (how am i going to be reassured)

me: mama man seriously Ive tried it before, just have little trust in me, can you trust me?

mama: (extremely long pause, where she is looking at me and thinking) bahee. (ok)

me: wooooo hooooooo

mama: yister allah

so she picked me up from work, i had printed of every thing, and i was psyching myself up, telling myself 'don't get frustrated when she gets panicky'.

i get in the car, we set of, every thing is fine, we get to the first round about, i tell her to take the first exit, which she does, the area we are in is still recognisable in her eyes, we go past the sainsburys, all the time she is asking 'wayn tawa (where now), i am telling her 'dighree dighree (straight straight), then i knew that a round about was coming so i said to her:

me: mama ba3id ishwayah 7ay jee jazeerat dawaran 9after a while a roundabout is going to appear) i want you to take the first exit.

mama: bahee (ok)

after a while she says to me :

mama: waynhee il jazeera? (where is the round about)

me: its coming

mama: taking a look at me from the corner of her eye then saying 'imshee ya kadhabah, manik 3arfah wayn mashyah (you lier you have no idea where your going)

looooooooooooooooooooool

me: walahi mama i do, matkafeesh, kunee shuja3ah (i do know where am going, be brave)

so eventually the roundabout comes, i remind her to take the first exist

me: mama the first exist

mama: bahee wayn (ok where)

me: tab3ee isayrah albiydah (follow that white car)

mama: wayn (where)

me: there can you see its gone into the first exist

mama: ok

she then follows the car and every one lets out a sigh of relief.

after that the directions went smoothly, we found car park, she managed to park and i was waiting for my praise of how excellent a directing person i was.

it didn't come..

so i said :

me: shir rayak fill dirta, mashallah 3alayah, mish giltlik 3indee il gudreeyah, saga3..(what did you think of my skills, i told you i had it in me)

mama: bahee kawys mashallah, ghair inkhamam fil merwa7. (its good, im just worried about getting home)

talk about an anti-climax lol.

i can safely say that i managed to get home with out getting lost