Monday, August 20, 2007

there is a misconception that after marriage, all woman gain weight, now this may be true to a certain extent, but what people fail to realise is that men also gain weight after marriage yet for some bizarre reason this is excluded from 'societies expectations'.

i think it really is unfair that the finger is pointed at the wife and not the husband, and even when it is mentioned, its usually through admiration, 'my isn't he content and healthy', 'lucky man, she must be a brilliant cook',

i googled the words 'gaining weight after marriage' and the results where 1,940,000 and i can guarantee the majority of websites are geared towards or are about woman, there was the occasional mention of men, in one website the article began in this manner 'MARRIED WOMEN AND men' looool so how come the woman gets the capital letters and not the man?.

one website gave these reasons for weight gain in married woman:

• You think you have found a partner for life, no need to attract him anymore.
• You need to let your hubby know that you are a good cook.
• You cook for the family, giving preference to their choice.
• You eat as much as your partner, talking and munching!
• You eat the left-over, trying not to waste food.
• Your partner encourages you to eat more showing that your extra fat is not going to turn him off.
• You want to be loved unconditionally, not happy with the marriage, feeling disrespected, rejected and unloved.
• Pregnancy occurs

well at least we have the excuse of pregnancy!!!! i just thought it was interesting, i was having a conversation with some one and even though we where jokingly commenting on reasons and what not, and at one point i had tears running down my cheeks from laughter as my imagination can get carried away, but at the end of the day i just want to point out that it can be both ways, men and woman.

another thing is when married woman point out to newly married woman 'my haven't you put weight on' and then have a full on conversation about the weight gain of the certain person, saying its a shame and what not, not realising themselves that they have no room to talk, literally.

anyway i always say so long as a person is comfortable in there own self, then whats the problem?


Brave Heart said...

hahaha WA
VERY FUNNY REASONs especially the first one
my theory says that: men start to lose weight directly after marriage for many reasons
1- he discovers that he made the big mistake in his live.
2-his wife take most of the food to her family.
3- the delicious food which he ate be4 marriage was cocked by her mother not by her.

we are very poor creation compared by u(women) :-P

programmer craig said...

You're right. I gained 20 pounds after I got married. I didn't decide to lose it again after I got divorced. My ex-wife stayed the same weight as a married woman that she was when I met her. In the example of my marriage, it was the husband (me) that gained the weight, not the wife!

Ever The Idealist said...

LOL!!! If a Somali (ie me) was to gain weight after marriage I would get constant praise. They would say things like 'praise be to God she has finally settled down' 'she has learned to cook and wount she be a good mother'

It makees me laugh how much Somalis like to get big (health issues aside)they love big ladies.

Am hoping nothing changes in the weight department tho as am happy the way I am Alhamdullilah.

You coming to circle tonight hun? I will be in oklahoma from 5ish if you wana join me IA Ameen xxxx

a_akak said...

lol lol lol love the topic and only our WA comes up with these topics but it is true for men that they gain weight after marriage but i think its shows that the man is happy and anything his wife cooks is good in his eyes (now thats a lie :P) and as for the female issue, form what i know, girls are more weight aware than guys thus they notice as we guys dont care that much

fe aman allah

white african said...

brave lol at point 2 and 3, but i think this case is ver low compared to those who do put on weight.

craig well its refreshing to come across a man who admits to this :) thanks for sharing.

ever your lovley as you are mashalah and whatever weight you gain or loose you will always be lovley aaaaaaw.

inshallah i will be coming today so im loking forward to seeing your somali self :)

akak ok so maybe girls are more weight conscious but thats usually because of what the man will think, hmmm i wonder what the situation would be if teh roles where reversed, the men cook and teh woman eat loooool


This gaining weight business is a two way street innit?

Big is beautiful.....and women carry it off better I'd say. Then again I come from culture where big women = beautiful women.

I'd say if its big :)

Weldemdina said...

as I was reading your post a plate full of chips and chicken dippers place on my desk , now thats explains it all lol, I had pizza for my dinner and when my wife asked me 1/2 an hour ago if Iwould like some chips I said no, but still she came back with the plate, now I bet B&J icecream is its way ..ya mo3een

Anglo-Libyan said...

lol very funny subject

obviously they didnt study the Libyan men :o)
almost all libyan men i know gained weight after they got married, a lot more weight than the females, I myself gained some but Alhamdulellah im back to my usual slimish weight now :o)

white african said...

native yeh man absoloutly, culturally speaking it wasnt that long ago where the perfect figure for a woman was the hour glass figure, which according to many is a size 16.

weld looooooool, well sa7a sa7a, enjoy your food bro, dont worry bout anything else :)

anglo welcome back :)

and congrats on loosing that extra weight, and libyan men do gain the weight because how can they not, libyan food rocks :)

Sister in Islam said...

it is also key not let yourself go..alittle weight gain is normal but when your packing on 20,30, 40..and your not pregnant u need to check yourself..Men too.

I for one would not be satisfied with myself if i gained large amount of weight forget what my husbands thinks..Its what 'I' think of my self.

You cant truly know what love is until you love yourself.

white african said...

sallam sister in islam, your right, and it takes efforts from both sides.

i guess the whole idea' of letting one self go' becuase they found there partner is wrong, efforts really should be made from both sides.

Highlander said...

'my isn't he content and healthy', 'lucky man, she must be a brilliant cook'

WA you are too funny, this is what we hear all day long. OK I'm size 16 now, better start dieting LOL

white african said...

highlander you the funny thing about diets is that once you tell yoursle fyour on a diet, then automaticlly your brain sends out message sto your stomach telling the god forsaken thing that its hungry aaaaaaaaaaah.

you have to trick it into thinking your not actually on a diet but that your full, so annoying this loosing weigh thing, i would rather bungee jump of a building