this one is for you my dearest grandmother...
my gran left for Libya this morning, bless her she was so excited, there was that twinkle in her eye and that constant smile cause she knew that in a few hours time she will be sat amongst her other children and grandchildren in the comfort of her own chair in the country that she so adores.
I woke up for fajir and gave my goodbyes to her, it was quick cause I didn't want her to see me crying, and even now will I type this the tears are obstructing my sight because deep down I don't know whether I will see her again in this life time.
its funny that even though I never grew up around my extended family including my grandparents, I still feel close to them and connected in a way that I cant explain, you learn to love them as you grow up through pictures and stories that your parents tell you about them, and then when you see them on the odd visit its like you've sat with them all your life.
my gran is the last living grandparent and she is what you would imagine a grandmother to be, the constant stories of the past, the love she emits, the care for you in the words she would say, that certain smell of incense and rose or jasmine perfume that surrounds her, the smile she would greet you with, the daily rituals of tea and coffee, all this my dearest gran I will miss.
she only stayed with us this time for 2 months yet the house feels so empty without her, its times like this that I curse the one they call gaddafi for preventing the years that me and my brothers missed out on of growing up with our grandparents.
I pray that my eyes will once again see her in this life and that Allah blesses her and strengthens her ameen...