Monday, February 25, 2008

it is near to impossible to please every one in your life, no matter how hard you try, some one is bound to feel that you have not tried hard enough and 9 out of 10 times they will let you know of their 'unhappiness' with you.

is there such a thing as unconditional support? obviously no but i would settle for 50%.

how about being sensitive to other peoples life pressures?

how about not complicating matters?

I'm being stretched from all directions and i can hear the sound of something about to rip.

can you stitch your own limbs back?


MusicLover said...

"it is near to impossible to please every one in your life, no matter how hard you try, some one is bound to feel that you have not tried hard enough and 9 out of 10 times they will let you know of their 'unhappiness' with you."

Hell with everyone just please me :-) just teasing

"is there such a thing as unconditional support? obviously no but i would settle for 50%."

Do you mean family, friends or ....
There is such thing unconditional support.

"how about being sensitive to other peoples life pressures?"

I think you are trying to please everybody and it will not work. Stop doing it.

Paul Simon & Art Garfunkel -

Bridge Over Troubled Water

Anonymous said...

In these situations if I knew whatever I do wasn’t going to be enough then I’d make sure whatever I do wouldn’t make things worse
cof - who else?


You really can't please everyone but I know can't help wanting to. If it helps....I is here :)

Plus.....I can help you stitch your limbs back sis!

UT said...

What's up dear ? email me I will help if I can. You have not 50% but 100 % unconditional support.
I for one am over sensitive to other people's pressures , yet I always get recompensated with a slap in the face. A people pleaser I am and admit, which has gotten me nowhere..... I try to withhold my feelings but still the goodness of me fights hard to strive and is too overpowering that I finally give up. I just hope and pray that the good deeds will add to something , one sweet day , or else life and the sacrifices one makes during a lifetime has been all a joke sigh !

Crowded Mind said...

you can't be for every one in this life,you can't help them all,and you can't please every one

just breathe and breathe and don't care don't shut yourself off

fe aman Allah

Anonymous said...

As-salâmu 'alaykum wa rahmatullâhi wa barakâtuhu. 100% unconditional support/love? No such thing. All these random people saying they support you 100% bullshit. They dont know you, not really, only those that really, really know you can say that.
However, everyone no matter who they are has conditions set on their support/love. (Except Allah swt, He is your greatest support, lover, confidant, friend. He will never let you down).

But on to human relationship about unconditional love. Not all conditions are bad, in fact they are good for the relationship and for society as a whole. Your husband/partner will love and support you as long as its reciprocated, you are loyal and faithful. Your friends will be the same. Your parents too, if you follow what they teach and what they thing of being right or wrong. however if you started stealing, thieving, prostitution, drugs, etc Do you think you'd get the support from friends, from family? they will love you, dont think that this will stop, but there is a limit to what they can do, what they can comprehend and understand. I'm not saying that this is what's happened.

Everyone gets a 2nd or 3rd chance. Some people have to learn the hard way, for them its the only way a lesson is learnt. Have hope in people and you will get it back (you'll be disappointed 8 out of 10 times but the 2 times it works out, will make up for it). Just as you think why cant 'they' understand I have other issues in my life, well maybe they have them too? its the easiest thing in the world to fight back against the ones that love you the most, rather then face the problems.

At the end of the day you need to realise that you are your greatest strength and your greatest weakness. All relationships need to be worked on, just cos you get to a certain plateau you think all the hard work is over? Not so. You can't please everyone, neither can everyone please you. Accept that there are times when you will feel and be let down by those closest, nearest and dearest to you, but if you can continue to forge your relationships and learn from it. then you have the best of it all.

The relationships that have been through the hard times, the fights, the arguments and total disasters, but are still there to make up, then the next laugh, the next moment of happiness is that much sweeter and precious.

InshaAllah this is just a episode in your life that will pass like many others and in time you will laugh over the silliness of it all. Trust me, everyone has been in the same position as you have been. God Bless. Jazâkumallâhu Khayran for taking the time to read this. Wa 'alaykum salâm wa rahmatullâh wa barakâtuhu

ibeebarbie said...

Salam White African,
If it helps just a smidge I think many of us know exactly what you are either talking about or experiencing. If we can be of assistance, please let us know.

LOL@Musiclover---"hell with everyone just please me.....I LOVE THAT!

Good one Cof.

cofman said...

I must admit I am a bit surprised until now we haven’t heard from white african

I know for a fact she is very intelligent and one of the most sensible libyans – does she not know sharing troubles make them lighter?
Does she not know one person she can trust?

I am puzzled!

Last night I went to meeting, discussing a number of important issues with some professionals
Before I went I was hoping that I would be able to solve all their problems,… all of them … but guess what?
Within the first hour it was crystal clear in my head that I – not them – had lots of problems that need solving

In other words, the meeting was worth going to

Just try and imagine life without testing and challenging episodes?
I am a strong believer in ‘ every problem has a solution’, if we look hard enough

cofman said...

in case you feel like sending a private message, just in case, the guest book is available

white african said...

thanks all for your advice, annon, music, ibee, native, uti, cof, crowded your all great.

its just a bad patch at the mo, things generally pick up soon (i hope).

im priortising at the moment.

will blog all about it soon inshallah.

Monday's Child said...

prioritising... I'm glad you said that... sometimes we get lost amid other people's needs and wants... for some it is so easy to please others and it's so rewarding to see smiles on their faces... BUT, everything should be done in moderation and we can easily get lost down that road when we forget to look after ourselves. I think you'll be fine WA... I have faith in you :)