Friday, May 30, 2008

is it just me or has any one else noticed that Libyan woman (might be the same with Libyan men) will point out every thing negative about you as soon as they see you rather than pointing out the positive. actually not just Libyans, Arabs per say (although Egyptians have a mighty sweet tongue on them).

say for instance you go to a gathering, say a wedding, people will come up to you and they have to give you the 'up and down look' you know the one, where she starts from your hair and scans you all the way down to your shoes then back up again.

these ladies would be perfect at working for airport security or maybe whilst shes scanning me with her eyes i could ask her whether shes detected any biological abnormalities in me, if your gonna be scanning me with your eyes lady then i might as well gain some sort of benefit by knowing whether i have long to live!!!

then its a case of 'you look so yellow', 'my god look at you, whats happened you've lost weight, your cheeks and eyes have gone in, you used to look so healthy before' or the opposite, 'my my you have put weight on, u had such a nice figure before' that extra weight on your toe will prevent you from getting married' (ok slight exaggeration).

or woman trying to constantly fix you some how, they cant help but reach out with their hands and change the hairstyle that took you 45 minutes to perfect, and every one is a qualified beautician, no matter how good you think your make up is some one is bound to say its not dark enough, or not enough per say...

blah blah blah blah blah blah

occasionally you will be shocked by a nice gesture from some one, but seriously why start with the negative. talk about 7ateming ma3naweeyatna.



eternal peace said...

salaams sis aww i cant say i've experienced that before where ppl try and fix your hair or clothes, but even in our community the weight thing is mentioned!

MusicLover said...

Welcome to Woman's World :-)

Jay Hawkins - I Put A Spell On You

Nina Simone - I Put A Spell On You

Creedence Clearwater Revival - I Put A Spell On You -

libyan said...

Analyzing women would be very difficult i think, and in your case, a newly married bride the attention will be more than just doubles, they will try to figure out how are you doing with just a look. Good luck with the ignoring, but i think we all got used to ignore these kinds of looks. Your comment remembered me of a visit to Libya after getting married, and everyone was looking at me because of me losing some weight, so first thing they say, you seem not happy in your marriage. Funny, just because i don't want to gain more i seem not happy.

Anonymous said...

Your are sooo right.
I can't remember the last time I walked into a room (looking glamorous of course!), went to a wedding or gathering in Libya without the head to toe scan...from both family and non family...with family being MOST critical. They sure know how to make someone feel self conscious...But what can you do but just igore them, stare back (but than ur mum will pinch u and say 3eeeeeb), bluntly ask is there somehing wrong??....or just say
7'ear mish 3ajbitkum...or in ur case say sorry ladies im taken and flash ur wedding ring!!(belated mabruk hope married life is treating u well)


I think its an ethnic thing lol

Ignore or stare or do whatever...just do what works 4 u :D

missin u WA!

lostkitty said...

:-) reminds me of our conversation yesterday at Oaklahoma! Its the same in every culture with women - they love to judge u, especially based on ur looks.

white african said...

eternal the whole weight thing can seriously give girls a complex, people need to back of :(

music tell me about it lol

libyan so true, you can never please them, you loose weight your un-happy, you gain weight = youve let yourself go aaaaaaaah

anon lol love the replies, i may just use them, the whole staring back doesnt work (tried it), i seriouly have contemplated walking into a sala (hall) with my pjs, my mum would kill me though :)

native great seeing that day even if it was for a mere mintes luv u

lost kitty it sucks, but its part of the culture package but i am determined to change things.

ASMA said...

if theres no negative u cant know the postive thats the life....dont be angery and deal w it as it is

Anonymous said...

I've thought about wearing my PJs too...aah...I might aswell feel comfortable while I'm being analysed, right!!Haha
I have found that, in these kind of situations I could say how I'm feeling...7'ear mish 3ajbitkum... but as long as I laugh/giggle/smile (depends on the company) at the end, they get the hint and no ones upset as such!!;-)

lostkitty said...

it takes time to implement change - esp since most ppl are stuck in their ways... but dont give up! Some things are worth waiting for.

Living Away said...

i was imagining their faces if i were scanned by those women. i love bareface, i rarely use make up and when i use it must be almost invisible. i love clean and simple looks and matching colors are not for me! i have my own style and definitely fashion is not in it.
i have soft curl hair, so i don't blow them and i don't allow anyone to do so.
usually i'm scanned by my thought and by the freedom i have in my soul and eyes and i can guarantee you i get a lot of lifeless women scared!

white african said...

asma im not angry i just dont understand why people need to comment thats all, theres a saying that says 'if you have nothing good to say then dont say anything at all' i guess many could learn from this lol.

annon i guess in situations like this it is better to laugh and giggle it away rather than panic and scream in utter frustration like i do, i will most def try your way and let you know how it goes :)

tahnia its gonna take centuries, not in our life time hun :(

living away absoloutly brilliant, stay that way and keep on the uniqness that is you :)

Anonymous said...

Good Luck with it remember though not everyone can handle the smart remark and giggle...but what can they do you laughed at the end to show that you think the situation is funny but you also let them know how who feel!!itrakbehum saba3 ard wa itnazlehum (i think thats the saying) and they cant do anything about it coz there will ALWAYS be a lady there that will think your comments smart and funny and would tell the others to lighten up!! Than the rest will tut and say....it3alimty baradaat al engalis!!hehe....can you tell im speaking from experience...maybe i should start up blogging... said...
This comment has been removed by the author.